Afriad of failure, and time slipping away

Image by Roby© via Flickr

Boy howdy, if we are talking about what really gives me pause, I would have to say the fear from seeing time spent in my life without getting closer to worldly success that will leave me rich enough to never worry about money again. I imagine I could have hit it big ten years ago, and so little is accomplished after so many hours spent. But that is crazy, because there is simply no such mechanism that removes all possible risk of financial disaster. Our little family is built on work done everyday and saving 2 bucks and spending only one -- and people who thought they had it made are, because of the housing crash, thrown into a situation they cannot fathom. Better to never get out of practice of working a little bit every day.

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I know in my rational mind that life is plugging away, doing your best, and using every little success as a base to save a little more, and take risks with whatever is left. I make the mistake of dreaming of some dramatic insight that would light above my head like a light bulb -- having this insight in the future, and suddenly, everything I need to do would flow effortlessly like water through a stream bed. But dreaming of that future day takes your focus off the daily work that life is really all about. That fantasy is just a haze over your eyes. Also, I really get a sickening feeling that my daughter's children will inherit a world that is dramatically harder to flourish in, because of ecological disasters. All signs point to water, energy, and food being more scarce for more people in more places. This turned out a little disjointed.