Uncooked Ramen Cup-A-Noodle: Salty & Crunchy

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Frankly, I couldn't care less about Martha Steward, as a professional home maker. I would be very interested in asking her about business, success, and managerial advice and stories. I would ask her about jail. But if I had to prepare dishes, I would show her the garbage I regularly consume, and horrify her with how I vacuum down large quantities of food down my throat in mere seconds. It is my super-power, and it surprises everyone. Very little gets in the way of my tummy and available calories.

Uncooked Ramen Cup-A-Noodle I just dump the uncooked Cup-A-Noodle in a bowl, eat it like some crazy bird's nest made from fried noodle, and lick up the salty chicken powder on the bottom. My cousin once said, after watching me eat uncooked ramen, that if I could eat that, I could eat a human baby. Perhaps, but a human baby probably doesn't have the same salt rush kick, and biting into the baby skull is probably not as crunchy as the uncooked ramen.

Whole Wheat Toast with Reduced Sugar Strawberry Preserve Whole wheat bread toast is awesome. The grocery store now sells reduced sugar strawberry preserve, which is good because it doesn't taste like eating pure sugar. It has a nice strawberry tang to it. Best when you spread the preserve, then fold over, so you get the contrast between the warm toast and the chilled preserve straight from the fridge.

Cold pizza w/ Frank's RedHot Buffalo Wing Sauce We have about 10 different hot sauces in the fridge that I use regularly. This is a particularly naughty one, what with the buttery savory added to the heat and the salt and garlic and the vinegar.