Am I talking to you, or am I talking to your defensiveness?

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If people put up a "fake face" or a bunch of social coping techniques, out of defensiveness, I try to pick up on this within the first few seconds. Then I exponentially escalate my own obnoxiousness until the whole situation explodes. I do this because I am a jerk about that. I could come up with some spiritual mumbo-jumbo to make believe I am so deep and so real, but the truth is that I enjoy being a jerk about that. Probably because I cannot handle multiple layers of duplicity in humans, because of my own social anxiety, so forcing the whole situation to explode is my technique to end the stress. I recommend it. You rarely miss out on much if you send defensive people running away shouting and angry at you.

Social anxiety and dating...

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"Um, wanna go get some coffee?" If you are a guy, and suffer from social anxiety: 1) get over yourself - if you do nothing else than buy a girl a cup of coffee and flatter her with a few minutes of attention (and awkward conversation), you have done well and done enough.

"Uh, wanna see the free showing of Dances With Wolves on campus?" If you are a guy, and suffer from social anxiety: 2) If you worry about your "friends" approval of girls you date - don't date. Until you scrape together some more maturity, just concentrate on being a friendly guy in a friendly group. Give girls a friendly smile and a friendly quick gaze in her eyes, because girls deserve friendly smiles and friendly gazes.

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"Uh, you want to dance? Oh, wait, this song is lame. Next song..." If you are a guy, and suffer from social anxiety: 3) Girls are interesting. Wait, wait, wait on trying to bed one of them. With the pressure off on trying to bed them, just soak in how interesting different girls are.

(Goth dance club) "Uh, you want I get you a bottle of water?" If you are a guy, and suffer from social anxiety: 4) Pertaining to the question of whether girls are attracted to jerks or not - forget it. Work on the assumption that you will be unable to conceal your true nature, and go ahead and wear your heart on your sleeve. You flatter yourself if you worry some girl will try to break your heart or take advantage of you - nobody cares enough to bother. Your "game" consists of bringing your whole self, and being brave enough to step ahead of shuffling crowd.

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(After camping with a group of friends) "Uh, I drew you a picture of the camping trip we went on." If you are a guy, and suffer from social anxiety: 5) Learn to love rejection. Every rejection takes you closer to a "Yes". "Yes" only comes after collecting a requisite amount of humiliating rejections - enough to callous you to sense of rejection. The more scared you are of a particular rejection, more important to collect TWO rejections before next day sun rise.